It's not me leaving the toilet seat up or forgetting to put away my water bottle. I have not found one black sock next to the bed. My kitchen floors are still clean and there are no crumbs in front of the TV.
Yes, Roger has been away for two days and everything is in perfect condition in the house. I honestly, don't mind any of the above things, I would take them over an empty house any day.
I have learned that I am not a cook when Roger is gone. My menu board looks like salads, bagels, and home made pizzas. (It's so easy cooking for one!) There is no milk in the house and that's perfectly fine with me. My mornings are a little slower and my mood is surprising relaxed.
I have learned so much about myself these past two days. I actually am starting to believe that God planned for Roger to leave me so He could work on me. I have been in tears more times than I can count these past few days. It is not because I miss Roger, although those tears snuck in there, it is because I am being changed. I am a selfish, stubborn girl. I struggle with forgiveness. I can have a heart of stone towards someone I don't admire. I am a hypocrite in my faith. But man oh man is God chipping away at that. I will not go into specifics here because right now is not the best time. However, I will tell you that I sat through church with tears rolling down my eyes learning about supernatural love. I've heard it over and over again but the truth is if God has forgiven me then I should be able to turn around and forgive others, if not I am a liar in my faith. God has moved me in ways that I did not think were possible and maybe in a few weeks I can share that with you.
Yes, I truly believe that God has big plans for me these next 13 days. Roger is not the only one on a spiritually journey this month!
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| My count down calendar! |
On another note, we are keeping very busy here! We just got back from NY where I was able to watch my baby brother graduate high school. I am such a proud big sister. I love my brothers so much and am so happy I was able to be apart of this special day.
Roger and I also visited with our favorite nephews. I loved spending the day with Jaxon and Dwade along with their parents. Jaxon is so close to my heart. I love watching him figure things out and see how God is molding him. Dawson whom we've affectionately named Dwade is just oh my goodness perfect. I love this little boy. I am deeply saddened that he won't have the same relationship as Jaxon and I do but I do cherish him as my nephew.
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| Jaxon and I at the park. Seriously, what's not to love about this boy? |
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| Terrible picture of Dwade and I but that fact oh that face :) |
Other than that, I have been busy busy busy packing my apartment. Roger and I move July 14th so it's right around the corner for us. I am excited for these next two weeks as God works in my life and am excited to move but more excited for Roger to come home to me.
We will see what these next few weeks bring... maybe more posts? :
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